Lindsay Parton | Another Mother Her Way
Written by Betsy Parton , an LA based mother, philanthropist and contributor to the MU community.
I can proudly call Lindsay Parton my sister-in-law. She is a loyal friend and is always up for anything which requires a heck of a lot of stamina considering she’s the co-founder of the dreamy Alchemy Works, a coastal California retail and gallery space, along with her husband Raan of the menswear line, Apolis. She's used to family business but since having her son, Maasden, "family business" took on a whole new meaning. While owning a business that she'd tirelessly grown into a prominent tastemaker, Lindsay recognized her want for space for motherhood and for time with Maasden to be the priority. She is candid about the changes she's made and the team she leans on to grow Alchemy alongside her son. While the transition into motherhood is not without its stressors, I love how Lindsay embraces the shifts as more of a blessing that her wish for motherhood has finally been realized and that every day, while everchanging, gets to be take-your-kid-and-husband-to-work day. Also, how California cool is Maas?
Q HOW DID YOU CHANGE AFTER BECOMING A MOTHER?
I feel that I changed the most after becoming a mom in that I was always good at getting lots done, having a long list of to-dos and stressing about seemingly nothing and have now realized that I need to slow down, delegate and enjoy each moment - as stressful as it may seem- and the fleeting time with my little guy. This lesson has expanded into my marriage and work/life balance also as we run our own retail businesses so there isn’t an “off” switch. It’s important to realize how one decision creates a ripple in other areas of my life now.
Q WHAT CHOICES DID YOU MAKE TO ACCOMMODATE MOTHERHOOD? WOULD YOU MAKE THEM AGAIN?
I am not in our two retail shops (@AlchemyWorks) as much as I used to be so my team knows that things need to be ready for my time there or else it can wait. This has made everyone understand my first and most important role now is a mother and then an employer. I would happily make this choice again but by no means do I have it figured out yet. There is a lot of pressure to do it all and do it well, so I am daily figuring this out in our own pace- I would add that asking our team for grace in that has been humbling but also worthwhile.
Q DESCRIBE YOURSELF AS A MOTHER IN 3 WORDS. WHAT KIND OF MOTHER WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE?
Joyful, Open-Handed and Gracious. Joyful and gracious because the blessing of a child is unfathomable until you have your own and our long fertility journey made us grateful for each smile, tear or snuggle. And I try to be open-handed in my parenting as in not concerned about inevitable changes and u-turns.
Q HOW DO YOU TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF OUTSIDE OF MOTHERHOOD?
I try to make time weekly for some me time - usually a quick massage or a work out is a nice treat, but it's also nice to connect with friends over a glass of wine to detune and keep my other relationships strong as well. It goes to say also that continuing my creative work in our stores helps me feel like myself but a better version of it also so it's fun to see how the same role feels more empowered and purposeful now.
Q EVERY MOTHER NEEDS HELP TO FIND BALANCE. WHAT DOES YOUR VILLAGE LOOK LIKE?
I have a few friends and family with similar aged babies, and it is helpful to compare notes and fun ideas with each other. I try to prioritize a nanny share with my sister in law weekly also so that Maasden gets time with his cousin and I have a few hours to get things done personally. Beyond these outside sources though my husband is a very supportive and holds an equal share in the daily care of our son since we work together (a huge blessing!) so we often cruise together all day and switch off feeding, napping or playing with Maasden. Anything we do together as our new family of 3 is so fun, so we enjoy those moments and realize how rare our set up is.
Q WHAT ARE YOU WORKING ON IMPROVING ABOUT YOURSELF AS A WOMAN & A MOTHER?
I always strive to be more patient and outward focused which is hard when the little daily things get in the way. I see myself growing and being more intentional about what I put my energy into now that I have a son, so my passions are shifting - but all for the better! You realize there is only so much time to give and now I want to focus on raising him well and to see the world as we see it. I think in this newfound strength of a mother you understand how much your capacity can grow so I am excited to see how I can further my work, passions, and family as a gifted result.