On The Complexity of A Woman's Confidence

Confidence is a powerful, mesmerizing and tricky thing. Too little of it and you're written off as weak. Too much of it and you're pompous. There's a tone that is hard to strike, especially for women. I sat down with a strikingly stylish woman recently and as I explained Mother Untitled - the thesis, my hope for our community and my caveats and concerns, I got back a constant refrain combined with a gorgeous chuckle - "Just don't care, I don't". 

I found her powerful and mesmerizing but her advice, tricky for me.  Because my self-assurance comes hand in hand with my self-doubt. There are days I think I am the smartest thing since sliced bread.  The next day, I'm questioning how my ideas and approach may land.  

They say confidence is quiet, insecurities are loud.  But I don't know why those two can't coexist in one sometimes quiet, sometimes loud, sometimes even voice.  Our insecurities, our vulnerabilities, our self-questioning make us more complex, more real and more forward-thinking.  

The concept of not caring what people think is bold.  It's fierce.  And it's just not me.  I do care, immensely. I care about what each of you take away every time you read a post.  I care if someone thinks this content is frivolous or my Instagram, vain.  I care when something I say, do or create sits poorly for someone.  

I came home and naturally dwelled on this woman's je ne sais quoi as the fashion world dubs it.  I think as women, especially mothers, sensitivity, vulnerability and insecurities are considered a dirty word.  But I wonder if we allow them to exist and hold them lightly, they can be what makes us special and thoughtful about what we put out in the world.  

Does this resonate with you professionally or personally? As a mother and a woman? It's a deeply personal topic, I know, but if you're up for it, I would love to hear your take on balancing confidence with your sensitivities. xo