Jacqui Rosshandler | Another Mother, Her Way
Jacqui Rosshandler is one of those women you want to lock in as a friend after your first ten minutes together. She’s Australian which comes through beyond the sweet accent in an easy going energy. As a bonus, she comes bearing treats. In her case, it tends to be samples for her business - eatwhatever - a tiny, strong concoction of essential oils which starts by settling your stomach and then freshens your breath (she just started an equally natural sister line, Woofmints, for pups). And somehow, even after the second or third glass of rosé, she remains incredibly smart, engaging and kind. Before having her daughter, Riley, last year, Jacqui built and grew eatwhatever and she's since adjusted her work rhythm to have more time for her family. Here’s her gorgeous chat on giving up on good hair days, the necessary nanny and the constant crisis about our careers.
Q HOW DID YOU CHANGE AFTER BECOMING A MOTHER?
Wow where do I begin? I think initially I was so surprised by how much I loved being a mother. I wasn’t so sure I was going to like it to be honest so when I had Riley and discovered how much I enjoyed being a parent, it changed my outlook on children completely. I used to savor my freedom and my selfishness. Being selfish isn’t necessarily bad but having a child has made me, not selfless, but pretty consumed with keeping my child and my home happy. Do I miss sleeping in, going to the gym every day and having great hair? Yes. But having Riley in our lives is so worth the other stuff I have less time for these days.
Q WHAT CHOICES DID YOU MAKE TO ACCOMMODATE MOTHERHOOD? WOULD YOU MAKE THEM AGAIN?
I guess career choices have changed. I travel much less now. When I do travel for work, it’s fast trips in and out, whereas I used to take a weekend on either side to visit friends and enjoy, say, a beach. Now I just rush home to be with my kid.
I took most of the summer off when Riley was born and now I work 3 days a week and try and get some work done on the other 2 work days that I am with Riley. I cannot complain. I have a great deal and I know it! It’s a great balance between work and being a mum.
Q DESCRIBE YOURSELF AS A MOTHER IN 3 WORDS. WHAT KIND OF MOTHER WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE?
Fun. Thoughtful. (Relatively) Easy Going
I would like my kid to be able to grow and learn without feeling the need for my approval. I’d like to be able to give her the space to make mistakes and find her own place in the world. I’d like to be supportive and I’d like her to like me. Not just love me but also actually enjoy my company, you know?
Q HOW DO YOU TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF OUTSIDE OF MOTHERHOOD?
I get help! I have an incredible “nanny” (she feels like family now so I honestly don’t know what to call her) 3 days a week so on those days I work out. I wash my hair. It sounds funny but if you have a kid you know that actually takes time! Once every few weeks I go get a pedi. We get sitters so that we can put Riley to bed and run off to have adult conversations over alcohol. We try and have a life filled with all the things we like to do. But most of the time we love to put Riley to bed, make dinner, chill together in our home and get to bed as early as possible!
Q EVERY MOTHER NEEDS HELP TO FIND BALANCE. WHAT DOES YOUR VILLAGE LOOK LIKE?
Our village is a little small. We have close family here in NY but they are young and busy and have their own responsibilities. Our nanny is our lifesaver and a group of local sitters that help out too. We need some bubbas and zaidas over here! HELLO?!?!?!
Q WHAT ARE YOU WORKING ON IMPROVING ABOUT YOURSELF AS A WOMAN & A MOTHER?
As a woman, I am continually pondering my career. Am I doing enough? Can I do more/something else to make the world better? Should I be working 5 days a week? Am I a good wife? Should we have another child? Today? Next year? Ever? Do we ever stop with this sh*t? I don’t know!
As a mother, I’m just trying to be more present. Less cell phone, more playing.