A Ritual To Maintain Friendships In Motherhood


I took the trip to Amsterdam last weekend with the same crew of girlfriends that I've traveled to Japan, Las Vegas, Napa and Central America with.  It's a group with whom I know our bonds deepen in travel.  Even if we haven't been seeing each other regularly those three days are easy and happy and give us loads of memories to build on.

I can't in all seriousness suggest travel as a way to connect with girlfriends for all of the practical reasons - finances, time, childcare issues etc. - but I have found a lot of comfort in having recurring activities to look forward to with different pockets of women.  

For another group of friends who I grew up with, we have a group text chain that keeps us in the loop on each others' families.  A group of women entrepreneurs and I meet in our workspace for a drink weekly.  They're relatively new friends but the momentum has built trust and coziness.  Another mom friend and I spend our Fridays together.  We both have boys around the same age so we'll head to the park or each other's homes on those mornings and afternoons.  There's something so intimate about motherhood, especially in the mornings.  A former colleague and I meet every month for brunch at the same spot and bat around ideas for our respective work.  

Prior to a lot of us having kids there was room for book clubs, manicures, workout classes or long e-mail catch ups.  But for now, recurring work or playdates work nicely. Obviously, not all my friends fit into a neat and pretty box of scheduled activities but I'll keep a handful of the ones farther away in my favorites on my phone so I can quickly give them a ring when I am on a walk in between places.  

Some of these rituals happen organically and some I'm diligent about continuing but each has helped me feel confident that my relationships with the women I love will grow after marriage and motherhood. 

Do you have special routines with your friends or are you more likely to spontaneously catch up? Would love to hear your ideas on this one xo

Featured Image via Kiel James Patrick